On 9 January, Br Ralph Arnell, FMS, passed away in Ashgrove, Queensland. Below is an obituary written by SoTS Provincial, Br Peter Carroll.
I’m saddened to advise you that Ralph Arnell died peacefully at the Andrew Villa Ashgrove this afternoon at about 4.00pm (AEST). His sister, Anne, was with him at the time. Br Dan Hollamby was there immediately after. Ralph was aged 78 and had been a Brother for 59 years. He would have celebrated his diamond jubilee this year. To say that Ralph faced health challenges in his latter years would be an understatement. He was first diagnosed with Parkinsons disease in 2011.
Medication helped manage this but over time the disease advanced. He suffered a heart attack in 2019 which necessitated by-pass surgery. While recovering, he then experienced a stroke. A melanoma was detected in 2018 and while initially treated successfully it metastasised. In mid-last-year options were exhausted and his specialists advised him that there was nothing more they could do, other than manage its effects. He slowly deteriorated, becoming dependant on nurses and bed bound. He was still alert and mostly pain-free until he slipped into unconsciousness on Monday.
Ralph faced these setbacks with calm and optimism. He never despaired or grew morose. He kept cooperating with Doctors and treatments over these years, and throughout the various stages and phases of his illnesses remained hopeful. Even when he required palliative care, he maintained his positivity and good humour. I was fortunate to be able to
spend time with him while at home for Christmas.
Though wasting away physically, he was bright, interested and able to engage in banter and
conversation. He was also enjoying the cricket, and in fact stayed alert until Australia won the series!
Ralph Thomas Arnell was born in Innisfail, North Queensland on 11th May 1946 to Marie (Legrand) and Ralph Leslie Arnell. He was the fourth of six children and was born after Jim and Frank, but before Patricia, Julie and Anne.
Patricia was the first to die. He was educated by the Good Samaritan Sisters and Marist Brothers in Innisfail, and then had four years under the Christian Brothers as a boarder at St Joseph’s Nudgee. The Marist influence remained strong, and he started the Juniorate at Mittagong in 1964 and entered the Novitiate in 1965.
He did all the things that monks did at the time. He studied at the Dundas Scholasticate, obtaining an Arts Degree at Sydney University, and then for 12 years taught across the old Sydney Province, in Queensland, NSW and Canberra. He then had what for him was a most satisfying and enjoyable four years on the Youth Team conducting Retreats for senior students around the Province. The collaboration with other team members, school staff and young people was a highlight of his ministry.
The next phase of Ralph’s life was off-shore, and mostly in Formation. He worked in PNG where he ran, as Brendan Neily recalls, “a delightful” Postulancy at Wewak. He also did Formation work at Lomeri, in Vanuatu and finally at MAPAC. The young men had high regard for Ralph and his approach to them. In fact, one of his former Postulants named his first-born son “Ralph” in his honour. His formation work brought him into close conduct with other cultures from Asia, Melanesia and the Pacific. This he benefitted from and enjoyed immensely.
Ralph and I shared community and ministry in the late 1990’s at Booval-Riverview. What he lacked in domestic skills, he amply made up for in the ease of his relating, his kindness, gentleness and humour. The staff of the school were particularly fond of Ralph, as they were in every place he went. There was nothing petty or malicious about Ralph. He meant well to all. He was a popular and admired personality. If life is a pilgrimage, then Ralph was a very active pilgrim. He read widely – particularly spirituality and literature. He had a vault of stories and poems. He reflected consciously and considerably. He prayed seriously and regularly. In fact, there was an “otherworldliness” about Ralph. It was something his mother recognised and spoke about. He did at times live in a world of his own. This isn’t to be critical of him. In reality, it was endearing and impressive.
Ralph’s pilgrimage has now ended, and I’m sure he has found what his heart desired. He is now one with the God of Mystery, Abundance and Joy that he searched so longingly for. In preparation for the establishment of the Star of the Sea Province in 2022, Brothers were invited to write a short profile about themselves. Ralph finished his with these words: “I give thanks to God for a fortunate life full of many blessings”.
In the same way, we give thanks to God for the blessings that came to us, and so many others, through Ralph. I offer Ralph’s family, particularly Anne, Juliet, Jim, Frank and their families our deepest sympathy. Ralph cherished both his adopted Marist and his own Arnell families, and was pleased that his illness brought so many together, particularly at the end of last year.
Ralph was most grateful for all the support he received over the years of his ill health. So many have been involved that it’s impossible to name them, however it was the staff at Ashgrove and at the Andrew Villa who were constant in their care, as it was the Brothers who were his daily companions.
I also offer our sympathy to Br Daniel Hollamby who has been most caring and solicitous of Ralph, and to the community at Ashgrove.
Br Peter Carroll, SoTS Provincial
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